The scene is set for the big International – who needs grass?

I had a day off this weekend and managed to get to a lodge at Lake Malawi for some R & R. It’s a nice place and the staff are great: the chef is multi-tasking between cooking and using her catapult to scare away the baboons.

He’s just finished the bar of chocolate he stole from the bar. Who knew that baboons like chocolate? Perhaps a love of chocolate feeds into the theory of a common ancestor.

I asked if I could borrow a kayak and the guy said, “Are you going round to the next bay for the football match.” I quickly established that this was, in fact, an International – Malawi v Burundi – for the AFCON 5-a-side cup. Definitely I was going to go to that!

Pulling up on the sandy beach beside the pitch I was greeted by Reuben. “I’ll watch your kayak for you,” he said, holding out his hand.

Mind your motor mister?

The only thing missing was a celtic top.

The game was well organised – no one was going to argue with the referee who must have been at least 6’8″. The crowd, however, was something else. The celebrations when Malawi scored – I think they managed 10 to Burundi’s 6 – were ecstatic and uninhibited. On one occasion the ball was back in the net before the celebrations for the previous goal had died down.

Huge referee! It was a hazy day but mostly it’s sand from the fast-paced action on-field

Football is the national sport here – closely followed by netball – and fans are every bit as passionate as back home. Some of the spectators left on a small boat to go back to their village. The name of the boat? “Van Persie”, in tribute to one of the greats.